3. “You are not [something] enough!”

By telling your child there is something lacking in them be it something on the inside or on the outside it hurts. While you are not specifically saying they are not enough you are implying it. This is something that will grow into your child feeling not good enough in life overall if you do not address it soon. Try saying “You are [something] enough, we can work harder at it.”

4. “Big boys/girls don’t get scared”

Yes, they do. This is not protecting your child in any way. They are scared, you cannot stop their fear by telling them to not be afraid. Everyone gets scared sometimes, even you. Face your fears instead of running away from them, that is what you should be teaching your children. Say something like “It is okay to be scared, everyone gets scared sometimes but I know something that will help.”

5. “You are worthless!”

This one is something that you should never ever say to your children. You are the person whose approval they seek the most they should not be afraid of what you might think of them. By saying this you are making them set out on a journey seeking approval from wherever they can get it. Try saying something like “No one is perfect sweetie, you will do better next time.”

6. “You are a bad kid!”

You should never make your child feel like they are bad as a whole. This also goes along with using the word rotten. You should try using the phrase “What you did was bad” Because their actions may not be as good as you would like for them to be but that shouldn’t make you think negatively of your child as a whole. We all make mistakes, that doesn’t mean we are all bad people.

7. “I do everything for you!”

Duh, this is your child, you are supposed to do everything for them. You should not be holding that against them, They did not choose to be born. You should be ashamed of yourself if you have said this to your child. They are not the problem when it comes to what you do for them they are there for you to take care of not the other way around.

8. “You’re fat”

This is something that also should not have to be on this list. You should never tear you children down like this. If you have a fat kid they already know they’re fat. They without a doubt hear about it from other children every single day. Home should be a safe place, not a place that they’re going to be bullied even more in.

Try saying something like “I’m thinking about getting into shape and being healthy, do you wanna give it a try with me? I don’t want to do it alone.” Negative labeling like calling your kid fat will lead to eating disorders and an unhealthy body image without a doubt.

It’s essential for parents to arm themselves with knowledge on positive parenting. “Positive Parenting: An Essential Guide“ is a recommended read for those looking to nurture their child’s spirit while setting boundaries.

Be careful what you say to your children. They are the ones who will be there to take care of you when you can no longer take care of yourself. If they grow up hating who they are and how you treated them you won’t have much of a caregiver when the time comes. Love your children for who they are and encourage them to do good, don’t tear them down.

And to ensure you are equipped with the best tools for parenting, consider adding “No-Drama Discipline: The Whole-Brain Way to Calm the Chaos and Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind“ to your reading list.